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I should probably fire myself for journaling right now instead
of painting...but I have to tell. I am working on a really really
really fun assignment. I have just begun and I'm kind of still
in the procrastination/thinking-it-over mode, but I'm excited.
Today is the day to prove myself to myself. (Notice how I build
all this up so if I have a bad day I can feel extra terrible about
it later?)
Okay. Gotta do.
I forgot, somehow, to show you the piece that I did for the
Fountain Square Masterpiece in a Day contest. So, here it is.
It didn't win anything, but I'm happy with it for myself.
I'll tell you what...if you can't think of anything to draw or
if you have artist's block, all you need to do is go sit in a
pretty neighborhood and draw the different things you see.
Inspiration is everywhere.
The funeral was beautiful. Held in a small church with gleaming,
cobalt blue windows. It was simple and peaceful. It felt good
to be surrounded by everyone else who loved him. The
weather was nice, too. The first warm weather funeral I've
attended. And, of course, the trip was book-ended by the
three hour drive back and forth. It was a good time to lay
back and think and dream and chat, watching the farms and
the fields go by, almost in slow motion.
I'm happy to be busy this week. I have lots of projects listed
on my chalkboard, waiting for attention. I'm excited about
them, waiting to see what spills out onto the paper. Such
a relief to see something form.
***
Don't forget about the Costume Contest! I've gotten a couple
of submissions so far. Send in yours!
My Grandpa
My grandpa always wears a cowboy hat. Black with white stitching.
Small brimmed. Like a little boy who rides around on a stick-horse.
I considered him a Chicago-cowboy, if anything of the sort exists.
He drives a big black van with a tire cover sporting white silouhettes
of square dancers...you see, he was into the square dancing. I remember
seeing the costumes on the rack near the play room. The big frilly skirts
my grandma would wear next to the ruffled red shirts my grandpa
donned. And I imagined them swinging each other around in circles,
laughing and clapping on their knees.
My grandpa calls all girls Susie Bell and all boys George. I remember
hearing him call out "Susie Bell!" and plopping down beside me and
pinching my knee, forcing me to giggle and squirm. He'd yank on
my pig tales and tell me that I have pretty blue eyes. He's sing my
name (maiden...) "Penny Kline's a friend of mine, she's a big cry-
baby all the time." and I'd roll my eyes and sigh. I now sing that
song to my friends, like it or not.
My grandpa has piercing blue eyes that look right down into your soul.
He'd ask a question and those blue eyes would demand a straight
answer. No dilly-dallying either. Truth. Now.
My grandpa has a crooked nose. The bend like a river that makes a
sharp turn. I always imagined that he was part Indian...or maybe just
had some Indian friends who told him all their stories. They'd wrap the
wool blanket around their shoulders, toke the peace pipe and speak
of buffalo and dancing rain. Maybe he just had it broken in a bar fight.
I never thought to ask.
My grandpa has a painting of chickens pecking at feed hanging
in his kitchen. It was painted by my grandma and it's damned good.
I don't even like paintings of chickens. In this same kitchen there is
a little vase made of carnival glass holding silver spoons. I remember
watching my grandparents take a spoon out of it to stir their coffees
and wishing I was old enough to like coffee.
My grandpa admired my cadillac last time I saw him. And he smiled
at me and said he remembered the last time he rode in one. 1967.
He said he loved me. And I said it back as he walked away to nap.
My grandpa passed away this morning. I will miss him. But I am grateful
for all the great memories I have of him.
Goodbye, George.
Why?
If we only have one life to live, why do we bother doing things that
make us miserable? I just don't get it. I realize that we must be
somewhat responsible people...but why waste the time we are given?
Why not do a little less and have a little less, but experience a little
more? Why not say no to something that we feel is not worth our time
or is wasteful of our energy? Would that make us bad people?
I don't know. I don't just want to spin my wheels, though.
I remember when I was first thinking about doing illustration. One of
the thoughts that was so compelling to me was this: I don't want to be
on my deathbed, surrounded by my loved ones and think "I spent my
life worrying about advertising hamburgers." Woh. that stopped me.
I was getting really worked up about a campaign for this or that...
so much so that I'd make myself sick. For what? No one knows. Now that
I'm out, I can't remember a damn thing about the specific campaigns...
I've sort of glossed them over. What I do remember are the friendships
I made and the conversations I had. I remember doodling in meetings
and feeling like that was pulling me to where I needed to be.
A doodle.
Is that important? I don't know. But I do know that it makes me really
happy to be doing this. And I love giving other people work and having
that smile come across their face. It's like crack, I tell you. And to me,
that smile is important. Feeling like I'm doing the right thing is important.
Feeling happiness is important. That's not wasteful. I may have a little less,
but I experience more.
Drum roll please...
The first surprise is up in the Surprise Me section. I'm really excited
about it. This is going to be a lot of fun. I hope you all participate.
I won't give anymore away, just go there and see for yourself.
Posts have been short and sweet lately because I am doing
a three-day, on-site stint at an agency. It's tiring, too. So I've
just been crashing instead of being motivated when I come
home. Ah well, it's only for a brief time.
Things I'm excited about right now:
1. The weather is finally a little cooler today and I can wear
long comfy sleeves and jeans. C'mon hats!
2. The leaves on the trees have just begun to change. I have
noticed some brilliant deep reds and some pumpkin oranges.
3. Cuffs. I'm really into these right now. Superwoman!
I really like this rose one (link) even though it's from
teenie-boppers-r-us (I heart Delias).
4. Fishing with a line and bobber. Is there anything more
relaxing? I like to watch the tiny ripples in the water.
5. My super secret surprise coming up for you. I hope to get
it launched this weekend. It's gonna be so fun!
6. Meeting friends for coffee once a week and blowing our
noses loudly together.
7. My ma. She's on a new chapter of her life right now and
I'm really happy and excited for her. (Love you, ma!)
8. Stamping. I bought a cool star stamp a few years ago and
just rediscovered it. It rules! Especially with white ink.
***
By the way, anyone living in Indianapolis should know about
the Fountain Square Masterpiece in a Day(link) going on tomorrow.
I competed last year and it was a lot of fun to see everyone out
on the streets with their paints or their pads and pens...there
was even a fashion-designer there last year. Come on down.
Oh my gosh, do I have something fun cooking up for you for the
first Surprise Me section. Hoop hoop! Stay tuned...
Whew!
I finished editing my kids book and put the final touches on the
spec illos for it yesterday. Such a good feeling of accomplishment.
Now I need to do the mock-up book and send it off. Then starts
the fun waiting game with waiting and then some more waiting.
I wonder if my patience will grow.
I thought I mentioned this earlier, but then I realized
that it got lost in the new website debacle. So here it
goes again:
The always amazing Christine has launched a new
web site: Darling Design. She's already done a lot of
fun and interesting things. I can't wait to see what she's
got up her sleeve now.
Getting in it.
There's something to be said for completely letting go
and getting down and dirty. Literally. When my mom
came down to school me on gardening, I was, at first,
wearing gloves, squatting down to avoid getting dirt
on my knees, and taking it easy. As the day rolled on,
I shed the gloves, shoved my hands down into the dirt,
and just sat in the mud where I was digging. I was
completely covered in filth. My face was dirt-smeared
and it was under my nails. But it felt so good. It felt
good to just be in the moment.
Same thing last night. I went fishing with some friends
on the lake. This time I didn't even try to hold back
initially. I just grabbed the worms, baited my hook,
and rubbed my hands off on my jeans. And I fished.
(Caught two doinkers.)
Sometimes I feel like I hold myself back figuratively
too. I like to keep things in little clean boxes that
don't push on the walls of my comfort zone. I know
what I've done before and I can do it again with no
problems. But going a little further sometimes makes
my heart jump. What if it sucks? I need to learn that
that's okay. Especially if it's for myself...just trying
to get dirty being in the moment.
For instance, Saturday I experimented with a new painting
technique. And it turned out nasty. Not the best. Colin
walked by and said, "I've seen you do better." and I smiled
because I knew he was right (and I appreciate his honesty).
And I just closed my notebook and didn't show anyone else.
Why would I? I was just trying something new to see if
it'd work. I can try it again later. I'm just happy that I'm
pushing back a little and getting in it.
Confession
I just can't stop eating chocolate pudding.
Inner Dialog, Subject: Self-Promotion
Penelope: Woh, now that my site is done I need to get the
word out so I can get some business. I better start thinking
of some fun mailers to send out.
Evil Twin: But wouldn't looking at one more website
make you feel ready with inspiration?
P: You know, you may be onto something there.
(an hour goes by)
P: Alright, that is enough. Time to put the pen to the paper.
E: But you don't even have your idea yet.
P: That's what sketching and thinking will help with.
E: Vince needs a walk.
P: No, he's sleeping.
E: You are hungry.
P: I'll just eat something while I work.
E: I just heard the mailman.
P: I didn't.
E: Better check.
P: (after getting the mail) Okay, now, pen to paper.
E: Where's your pen?
P: Right here.
E: Oh. Um...I heard that magazine over there has an
interesting article that would help you right now.
P: (grabs the duct tape to tape E's mouth shut) Pipe down.
I'm sure this is the case with every self-employed person:
battling the inner procrastinator. By nature, I don't
procrastinate all the much (just a smidge). But when
it comes to doing self-promotion or something for
myself I sure do. How does one go about picking
or creating the perfect image to send out to potential
employers? How does one narrow it down and design
the best piece that won't get immediately thrown in
the trash can. When I was at the agency it was really
simple: when I got mail, some things I threw away
before I even pulled it out of the envelope (yes, I felt
guilty about it), and some things got pinned up on my
bulletin board or filed away for future reference.
And that's fine and dandy...judging someone else's work.
But not your own. You're too close to it. It's right
there with you every day. It comes from you, so
therefore it's hard to be objective.
It's like this: I believe that Vince is the best dog
in the entire universe. But I know that Kate thinks
that Maggie is the best dog. And Evan thinks that
Rosie is...See? There's no way to be objective.
So, I guess my game plan is to just do something.
Anything. And send it out. And if I get no response,
send something else out. And something else after that.
Now...where's that magazine that had that interesting article?
Welcome!
Welcome to the new site! A lot has changed. A lot lot.
Take a look around. Make yourself at home. I hope you
like it. If you notice any broken links or it looks wonkified
to you, please shoot me an email. I'll see what I can do.
Enjoy!
He's Not the Type of Squirrel You
Take Home to Mama.
Meet Vince's arch enemy. The only being
that can get under his skin and make him
crazy and bonkers...and psycho. Mister
Badass Squirrel. It's not just Tom and Jerry
foolery, it's much deeper. Much much deeper.
They give each other the stink eye
from the windows.
They have game plans and strategies.
They try to take each other out.
No, it's not playtime anymore, my friends.
Mister Badass Squirrel (or MBS) keeps
big, bumpy green nuts in his cheeks
for amo. He takes them out at just the
right moment and wings them at Vince's
head, barely missing the eyes.
Then he jumps out of the tree behind
the wounded creature and takes off
for the nearest telephone pole. Zoom.
Brave. Undaunted.
MBS races up the telephone pole, Vince
close behind, and proceeds to bark back.
It's not pretty or cute, mind you. It's
downright disgraceful.
And it's gotta end.
(Do squirrels hybernate?)
***
By the way there are only 5 bras left.
Any takers?
THE BRA SALE
Okay, here's the little birthday surprise!
I've gotten a lot of email asking me to sell stuff,
and I'm working on something more traditional
(cards, etc). But for now, I thought it'd be cool
to offer some illustrated bras. There are only 13,
and 13 total. So it's a first come, first serve type
of deal. When you click on the link, it will explain
a little more...but for now, because I'm not set up
to take paypal yet, it's gonna have to be an
old-fashioned "email-me-to-buy" situation.
So, if you see one you love, just email me.
(I'm accepting checks and money orders.)
THE BRA SALE
(illustrated, of course...don't be dirty.)
Birthday Weekend
Yay! This weekend is my birthday. Well,
specifically, Labor Day is the day. So the
whole world has a holiday just for me!
(Just let me dream, okay?)
I'm excited because tomorrow I'm having
a little cookout with some friends. Then
Sunday my ma is coming down to help
me get my flower garden in order. You
see, she's Miss Greenthumb. I, apparently,
didn't get that gene. It's really bad. We
literally had to mow our flower garden
it's so overgrown. My mother tells me
I should be ashamed of myself. (Don't
I feel sheepish...)
Ashamed as I may be, I'm really excited
for the festivities this weekend. I plan
to wear my giant birthday cake hat
as much as I can.
Also, stay tuned because I'm working on a
little birthday surprise for you, dear readers.
A little sumpin sumpin you may like. I hope
to be done with it by the end of the day,
so keep checking back.
I'm gonna go light all the birthday candles
in the house now. Peace.
Goofball Jones
That's what my mom used to call me
when I was small. Goofball Jones. I liked
to wear different colored socks on each
foot. I wore a purple skirt when denim
was the thing. I don't know why. I just did.
Things haven't changed much. Last night
we went to get a new pair of sunglasses
for me (use up that vision insurance we
paid for). I went with every intention of
getting a nice, solid, reasonable pair.
I tried on every pair in the store. Big ones,
little ones, brown ones, black ones. And
I was about to go with a sensible rimless
kind like my sister-in-law has (she is
really stylish), and then, this pair caught
my eye. Really big, gaudy, plastic orange
ones. Ooh! I had to have them. So, I thew
back the little, stylish pair and got the
el-dorko ones instead. Why not?
***
On the news side of things: A while ago,
I got an email from a lovely woman named
Hatice who has a Turkish cooking blog.
She asked me to do a masthead/logo for
the site. Actually I did three so far (she changes
them out each season). She now has adorable
aprons for sale with one of the logos on it.
(Well, I think they are for sale...I can't read
Turkish). Anyway, check it out. There's an
English version there, too if you'd like to try
out some authentic Turkish dishes.
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© Penelope Illustration. Stealing
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